Whats missing from this picture? (rant)

missing_coffeeQ. Whats missing from this picture?

A. The damn coffee machine!

Everything feels harder, stranger, and less elegant when you’re not dosed to the eyeballs with caffine. Is it true?


Many years ago a (now ex) girlfriend of mine said that I was addicted to caffine and sweeteners. Further, she said that removing the copious amounts of legal drugs I intake each day from my diet, will in-fact make me healthier, happier, more friendly.

Hmm, interesting proposition, I can quit anytime I want.

Rather than my normal first response which would be to rant, ignore her, and crack open another Diet Coke – I decided to quit all caffeine products for 3 months. You know, for science (and because I’m a pig-headed kinda guy).

After a few days I felt like crap. Headaches, sick gut, you name it. I felt poor and was not enjoying the experience at all. I started thinking that she might have had a point. The only thing that kept me going was the fact that I’d promised myself to see through 3 months. After several weeks thought everything started to settle; and the good news for me was that I was feeling ok again. 1 month later felt pretty normal.

The bad news for her was that apart from the initial withdrawal my mood did not change one bit. I am the same ranty, sarcastic bastard with or without coffee, EXCEPT that I enjoy drinking it. So now I’m going without something I like because I’ve made a stubborn promise to myself. Imagine giving up something you enjoy for 3 months, and it not making you angry? Nope, didn’t think so.

In fact the overall impression from my friends was that I was more acidic when not having coffee, than when I’m on it. Likewise good food, alcohol, etc. If I’m not overdosing, and its in moderation, then but the hell out.

Lessons of the story:

– Coffee is a wonderful thing that has some side affects. I like the affects and happily accept the side affects and damage its doing to my system. This is not a cigarette folks, its OK.

– Don’t ask somebody to quit something, unless you’re really sure it will help.

– Don’t be a stubborn arse and promise yourself to hold off for 3 months. Its fine to have strong will, but sheesh – I messed the stuff.

– Chocolate coated coffee beans are the fastest way to inject caffine into your system after a few days off the stuff. I love them.


6 thoughts on “Whats missing from this picture? (rant)

  1. I have some good news for you.

    Coffee consumption has been linked to breast size reduction[71] and taking regular hits of caffeine reduces the risk of breast cancer.[72] Coffee appears to reduce the risk of Alzheimer’s disease, Parkinson’s disease, heart disease, diabetes mellitus type 2, cirrhosis of the liver,[73] and gout. So no moobs for you. The antioxidants in coffee prevent free radicals from causing cell damage.[

    The bad side is it increases the risk of acid reflux and associated diseases.

    So don’t worry, its not as bad as that lieing ex made you believe. There are positives and negatives to drinking coffee. Do it if you like it. I know I can’t make it at work without a couple shots of the dark roast.

  2. Oh god, chocolate-coated coffee beans… Now I’m craving the things because they’ve been mentioned 🙂 I highly recommend them if you need to do any furniture rearranging for the seemingly boundless amounts of energy you have, loads of enthusiasm, and combined with loud music it makes the whole process more fun. Plus snacks!

    I haven’t figured out exactly why yet, but instant coffee will make me jittery and give me a headache, but the coffee you use in a plunger or percolator is fine. I don’t want to think about the possible chemicals in instant coffee that causes that reaction.

  3. “Coffee consumption has been linked to breast size reduction[71]”

    Andrew your man-boobs are shrinking. Have you lost weight?!? LOL

  4. I went without caffine sucessfully for a month- found I slept better – wanted to sleep more and felt better generally, but I’m a city office worker. Without coffee I would declare war on the world daily.

  5. @Bob – and he’s me thinking my boobs were one of my best assets! The chicks don’t like man-boobs? Darn, huh – I’m stuffed.

    @pug – sleep was an issue, but work stress keeps me wake fare more than caffeine. I know what you mean by war.

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